Talking Shki

I am going through a very clumsy stage at the moment. In general I am a very well put together level headed kinda girl, and have managed to go through my life without doing anything too embarrassing in public. But recently I have found that no matter how careful I am being, the gods are up above playing tricks on me and as a result I have been transformed into a clumsy fool.

In the last month I have:
Spilled my drink over my desk approximately 20 times (I kid you not!),
Tripped over 5 times (resulting in ripping my favourite jeans),
Fallen out of bed once,
Forgotten to turn the oven on twice (actually I have only used the oven in my flat twice)
Stubbed my toe on the edge of my bed 6 times (my little toe is triangular shaped)
Washed my hair with conditioner instead of shampoo twice
Washed my hair 4 times because I picked up the shampoo instead of the conditioner 3 times
Oh and then I have walked into the giant pillar in my office a total of 4 times.


I am sure there are more weird and wonderful things I have done over the last month, but seriously, I think that list above is more than enough!!

Eli: Channah you are seriously clumsy at the moment. What’s wrong with you?
Levly: Yeah Chans you are worse than me! Ha ha
Me: I don’t know what is wrong with me!
Eli: Well I am moving my glasses out of the way. I don’t trust you not to stand on them.

It is bad enough that my best friends are now moving their precious items out of my way “just in case”, but people in my office are also starting to notice:

Nic: What is wrong with you at the moment?
Me: I have no idea
Nic: Period?
Me: No
Nic: Maybe you’re in love!

Yeah… I don’t think a little crush constitutes love! Love! Hell no!!

I have been at the supermarket buying last minute essentials for Eilat. I woke up this morning to realise that I had run out of razors and deodorant (other than the white stick that is more successful at staining my clothes than keeping me fresh all day long). It is funny how going to Eilat for me is a nice weekend break living in Israel. You forget that when you were living in England the idea of going to Eilat was pure luxury.

TP: I’m so jealous! I’m coming too!
Me: Seriously? I would love it if you did! I would be your BFF
TP: BFF?
Me: Best friend for ever and ever – I would even consider naming my first born after you
TP: Why not name all your kids after me?
Me: I would shout out “Tal get your shoes on” or “Tal you are grounded” and they would all think it was them! And as I hope to have 4-5 kids it could become very very confusing.
TP: Well it’s what George Forman did.
Me: Loser

Meanwhile we are both trying to work while thousands of miles apart. He asks how my love life is going and I ask about the wife and kiddy. It is funny how despite being so far away, despite not seeing each other more than once a year he will always be the person I go to for advice on men and relationships, and I will always be the friend he send pervey msn icons to with no fear of his wife getting jealous. I open a bottle of diet sprite and it explodes all over my computer, while Tal (TP) also pretends to work while scouring the web for new blogs.

TP: You’ve got me really addicted to Blogs. I’m blaming u for lack of sleep and possibly losing my job… square eyes…. And lack of exercise.
Me: Maybe you should write one! Under a pseudonym of course…
TP: Not sure I’d let you read it though
Me: Why? Unless you are going to write about your undying lust for me
TP: Of course! I’m going to call it
“guy with a one track mind”
Me: Ok I am blocking you now!
TP: Ah…. My work is done!

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About channahboo

I was once a Yorkshire lass, I guess I still am, but after moving to London and then on to Tel Aviv, New York and then back to Tel Aviv again, I wonder how much of the Yorkshire lass is left. The adventure continues and although many see my life as an extended episode of Seinfeld (you are free to laugh), I can also empathise with the Buddhist thought of life as our punishment. I guess the important part is the love that you carry with you through life’s journey and my back often feels the joyous strain of the weight of the love I carry.
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5 Responses to Talking Shki

  1. Mr Shki says:

    lovely!i feel totally and utterly honoured.now u have to name your kids after me

  2. Ginrod Isus says:

    thanks for blogging all your conversations today. now i don’t feel like i have missed out on not being on MSN. yeaawww and yikes.have fun in eilat!

  3. DolceVita says:

    dont forget you stuck your foot in the dustbin the other day!!

  4. elif says:

    werent you kissing the giant pillar in your office????

  5. channahboo says:

    Okay okay okay…So yes I did put my foot in a dustbin! I also bit my finger when eating a sandwhich, but if I put in everything I did then there would have been no room to write anything else!And yes Eli you are correct, I did kiss the giant pillar in my office only in the hope that it may stop it from knocking into me… and so far so good! 😀

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