Another night out with peeps, this time the JSAP took me for sushi with a couple of her friends and of course the ginrod. It is always a strange dynamic when 4 girls get together, the conversation will generally turn to men and dating and heartbreaking, but when you add a single guy to the group it becomes awkward if not impossible to allow the conversation to go down that route. So instead you eat your sushi, discuss life, religion and politics and enjoy intellectual debate over whether a mashkiach has to turn on the oven or whether he is just there to watch and keep out of the way… By the time we left to walk to a pub for more drinks my belly was ready to give birth to little sushi and I was aching for some light and silly conversation.
The only problem is that at the moment I am finding it hard to do the small talk, to chat shit… well maybe one or two people can suck it out of me, but by and large, small talk is out. I thought about running away to the beach and jumping in, but I decided that that was merely the sushi inside me trying to get home… and if I had got in the water I would have been more waddling to the beach and sinking rather than run and swim. And then there is the worst part, when all you want to do is pick up the phone and speak to someone, but you stop yourself because it is their turn to call you, because Brazil is playing Croatia and that is what they are going to be thinking about… not you, because quite frankly it is getting pathetic and you should be thinking about something more important! That is always the straw on the camels back for me… so I order another wine and strike up a conversation about the Russian/ Polish blood flowing through my veins and realise that I am a European Jew through and through… no interesting family skeletons in the Graham closet! Well none that I have been told anyway…
Sometimes I feel like I am living in a snow globe whose flakes have all but settled on the scenery and is only aching for me to shake it up again. The only thing is that after 27 years of shaking it up for myself, the fun has pretty much gone and all I want now is someone else to come along and shake it for me… let me watch the joy it gives them for a change.
TP: What do you want honey? You have to be able to say what you what.
Me: I just want a guy I like to randomly turn up at my door, throw me over his shoulder and take me out on an amazing night out… and then ravage me at the end of the evening.
I mean that is what I would do if I were a guy and I liked a girl.
TP: Yes you would…
Me: But that is because if I were a guy I would have balls!
TP: That you would. That’s something I would definitely like to see on your blog… Doesn’t have to be too crude, you could just hold some strategically placed tennis balls.
This weekend is all about Eilat… I am starting to really enjoy these weekend getaways, although my bank is going to have something to say about it pretty soon. And then there is the forthcoming birthday, and the age old question of what to do, who to invite, to make a big deal or to just have a quiet dinner with select friends. This year I have a craving to get scandalously drunk and make a fool of myself. But on the other hand I am also thinking about a chilled weekend up north… hmmmmm maybe a long weekend can be split between the two… any takers?